Lawrence of Insania

It looks as if Maurice Clarett's (possible) #1 role model is going away for quite some time. In revisiting Phillips' history of inane misadventures, society can breathe a collective sigh of relief that LP, this biggest waste of talent since Darryl Strawberry, did not permanently maim or kill anyone during his G-force accelleration downward on what seemed to be a bacon-greased spiral. At least he has honed his sandlot football prowess, in preparation to play in the Stoney Lonesome's real-life version of The Longest Yard.
From an All-American sure thing at Nebraska, to a whole new style of penal recruitment. Hello Muslim Extremists, my name is Lawrence Phillips. Here is my rap sheet, I mean, resume.