Has Anyone Seen Juan

Chicago's incredibly overpaid shortstop does not like anyone getting too close to his wheels. Two men apparently did, now Juan Uribe, his brother Elpidio and an unnamed bodyguard are under investigation for their alleged involvement in the shooting of a Dominican farmer and an Italian Naval captain. According to authorities, the victims walked too close to Uribe's Jeep, prompting Juan and his bodyguard to open fire on them with a handgun and a shotgun. The navy captain, Dondolin Alessandro, was treated for wounds to his stomach and hands. The farmer, Antonio Gonzalez Perez, had an elbow injury.
Whether Juan is found guilty or not, there is still one brutal crime he has committed. That of a .262 lifetime ballplayer cashing checks to the tune of $4.15 million from the 2005 World Series Champs. All while residing in the manager's doghouse for dogging it on the field.